Thursday, September 21, 2006

And So, an ironic tale

And So
….you have countless almost finished projects lying around. Most of which have been in some state of progress for months.
….you have been cleaning out and organizing your work space for a week, and are overwhelmed.
….although you have vowed to finish your current projects before working on another, and certainly before Starting yet another…you are bored to tears by the stockinette, you are uninspired by the Spring colors and style of the suit,
…in short, you long to work on something for Fall. It is blessedly cool. There is a crispness in the air that is so uncharacteristic of this area of the country this time of year, but is very reminiscent of home.

So you think “What can it hurt, one day to work on something for Fall, something new and exciting?”
You pull out the luscious Jo Sharp Silkroad Aran in that burnt umber color you have, you pull out the swatch you did a year ago, you pull out the cabled cardigan pattern with the vintage 50’s fit and styling that you’ve been wanting to start…you go match it to 3 different woolens in your stash to make sure there are pant and skirt options for this without shopping, although you feel much too fat to even contemplate cutting pants out now.
You look at the swatch, (which was washed and blocked and grew in the blocking) you realize that in order to get the 5 st to the inch you need, you should go down 2 needle sizes, which will improve the look of the stitches too.
And you hide from everyone, knowing that you are expected to do what you’ve vowed to do, that is, finish up that stockinette sleeve etc., and you cast on. You decide to knit the cardi in the ‘round’, adding the stitches for the two fronts and the back together for a total of 290+ stitches.
Hmmm, that seems like a lot of stitches for a cardi knit out of a light worsted at 5/in. You do it anyway. You get 250 st cast on and realize you are going to run out of long tail. You take it off and start again. You get close to 200 st cast on and encounter a knot. You take it off and start again.
You have the cast on and begin knitting. A full sk is finished and you begin the second skein. You look at the picture, wondering at what point the buttonholes come into play, and you realize that in your cockeyed figuring you inverted the patterning, and that you have a purl band where you should have a cable band at the center fronts. You slide it off the needle, to rip it out, and start again. As it comes off the needle you stare at it in awe. “WTF?” You get out the tape measure. This baby, at the hemline measures 55 inches. You think to yourself, hmph, good thing I turned the patterning backwards in my head and had to take it off, or I might have knit the whole cardi for a 3x. You unravel the whole, after measureing the gauge over cables and rev stockinette. You get out the calculator, and after some figuring think that the designer that wrote the pattern was cracked in the head. You open up excel on the computer, you redesign and redesign, and come up with numbers that will work, taking into consideration that this yarn grows .125” per inch in the blocking. You reduce the 9 st cable braid to a 6 st simple cable twist in order to keep the overall look yet get it small enough to fit.
You pack it all up, take it to your Wed night knitting group, and cast the lovely Jo Sharp Silkroad Aran onto the needles yet again. You knit the foundation row and then get knit up through the first cable twist.
You go home, go to bed.
And sometime in the middle of the night, wake up and realize that something is still wrong. You go get it out, get out the tape measure, and … yup.. The 6 stitch simple cable shrinks down to 1.125”. The 9 stitch cable twist shrinks down to 1.25” as measured from the first attempt. For the difference, you could have left the 9 st braided cable in and had a much more interesting cable. You put it away and go back to bed.
You wake up in the AM, make a pot of coffee, take the latest attempt off the needle, and unravel and wind the lovely Jo Sharp Silkroad Aran back onto the ball, knowing that you will cast it back on for the 9 st braided cable.
After you finish the stockinette sleeve that you should have been working on to start with.

There is a knitting God and he will be appeased.


Elizabeth said...

Oh, see what happens when you try to subvert your destiny???

Carrie K said...

Marooned on Sleeve Island. Not drifting from shore to shore.

But that just made me giggle, Marji.

AR said...

Bet you still didn't learn your lesson, did you? I haven't. I guess I have startitis! It's catchy, too. I've heard of other cases in the knitblogisphere!

tatjana said...

Oh Marji. I feel your pain, I really do. Just be glad that at least you're not making more yarn ;)

Marina said...

Oh Marji! Took you a while to learn, didn't it? I'm so behind in Henry, I'll be staying with you till the end of September!

Donni said...

Funneeeee - and also made me realise just how much of a fly by the seat of the pants knitter I am (gauge swatch? gs washed? calculator?)

Becky said...

Well that was an adventure, wasn't it?! Hope that sleeve gets done soon so you can play around some more. :)

Jennifer said...

Oh no! Isn't it interesting how problems can be solved, or found in sleep?

DeeAnn said...

Hehe they'll get you every time! So how's that sleeve coming? :-)

Brigitte said...

Yup. Been there. But it doesn't mean we won't do it again...


Paula said...

Oh Marji your post cracked me up!
You have such great knitting humor I needed it today! Thanks!
P.S. Great socks! Are you going to knit them?

Lorraine The Knitting Hammy said...

Marji- Yes, but the knitting God can sure bust your chops sometimes, it's gotta be a he!
Sounds very similar to my life lately, completely stuck in neutral!